Home    Info    Ask    Links
About: Welcome to my photo-art-writing-music blog thing. All images, words and sounds contained herein are created by Heath Yonaites and copy-written © 2012 All RIghts Reserved unless otherwise noted.

If you enjoy what you see, read, and/or hear please feel free to say hello. If you hate this blog don't tell me, I'd prefer to live in ignorance and assume I'm still an okay guy. Thank you.
Born in the summer of 1883, Heath Yonaites was a rare virgin birth to a young Inuit dog-sled builder. Tragically, a month later the Indonesian island of Krakatoa erupted, plunging the planet into an unstable and cold weather pattern. The tiny village where the infant Heath resided was hit with a super-blizzard which flash froze his unattended body beneath several feet of snow. He was lost to his Mother. Nothing more is known of her.

Over 80 years later an iceberg with a baby on top was seen floating near Unalaska Island. Captain Kilgore St. Jupiter of the Melba Toast Isles, of the schooner "Divorced Knuckle," was able to rescue the now unfrozen newborn from the iceberg and ferried him to shore in Anchorage. There Heath was purchased by a traveling fork salesman who quickly lost him in a poker game to a rival spoon salesman. This man, Zane Yonaites, raised Heath as a Zapotec Druid.

Much is unknown about his formative years but in the 1990s there is mention of Heath subbing on rhythm guitar at a Monsters Of Rock concert in Sheboygan, Wisconsin for the "nuclear" metal band Öpën Hämmër. Quickly allowing fame to go to his head, he burned out and traveled to Amsterdam. There he wrote a number of angry letters to the editor of the newspaper "De Staatskrant" and stole bicycles.

The early 2000s saw Heath as a champion thumb wrestler appearing on ESPN late night programing. His skyrocketing career was cut short when he suffered severe ligament damage while applying his trademark "over the top" move in a heated semi-final bout with Finn "Ger the Nail" McDonnagan. Heath never thumb wrestled again and now resides in the Sonoran desert where he is trying to train rabbits to hunt in packs.

-Who Is This Guy?-



  1. nature-14 reblogged this from thatgirlwasmeanttofly
  2. destructivemannerisms reblogged this from makumozo
  3. thesludgepuppyred reblogged this from letitbejude-letitbe
  4. starfishinspace reblogged this from felixpeppercorn
  5. sazhamodar reblogged this from makumozo
  6. felixpeppercorn reblogged this from efiasko
  7. efiasko reblogged this from makumozo
  8. erenor reblogged this from blua
  9. athleticojunebug80 reblogged this from trance-owls
  10. anteater-eats-ants reblogged this from makumozo
  11. caseypants reblogged this from treee-magic
  12. noqancheq reblogged this from makumozo
  13. ricochetmusik reblogged this from eskizzle
  14. celeste-moon reblogged this from phases-0f-the-moon
  15. phases-0f-the-moon reblogged this from tranquilforests
  16. justaweirdpersonthing reblogged this from makumozo
  17. letitbejude-letitbe reblogged this from makumozo
  18. formlessruin reblogged this from possumscreech
  19. lookingforal-ass-ka reblogged this from shitdickfuckmothafucka
  20. mad-lion16 reblogged this from makumozo
  21. colesarar reblogged this from mordicaifeed
  22. mordicaifeed reblogged this from realmcovet
  23. realmcovet reblogged this from treee-magic
  24. freedbyalchemy reblogged this from makumozo
  25. thevisualcliff reblogged this from infectedinsides
  26. ovverthatmountain reblogged this from mercurial-spirit
  27. sierra-alondra27 reblogged this from alii-oranges
  28. certainshades reblogged this from talisman
  29. alii-oranges reblogged this from nicholasinski
  30. nicholasinski reblogged this from talisman
  31. sarahyfairy reblogged this from treee-magic and added:
    this is too magical
  32. cricketgiggles reblogged this from osccarr
blog comments powered by Disqus
"Spin Madly On" theme by Margarette Bacani. Powered by Tumblr.